Tuesday, 17 October 2017

Talk Tuesday | How I cope with my Anxiety #BISDTT

Hello, Hi, Bonjour, Hola, Ciao, Ola, Namaste ....

welcome back to Talk Tuesday. 

This week I thought I would share with you how I like to deal/cope with my Anxiety.
Now, I have suffered for a long time. I have medication which takes the edge off day to day but I still suffer several times a week, with Anxiety attacks, panic attacks and episodes.
It's not easy, it never will be and different things work for different people BUT you need to almost try before you buy. Test run the lot.
You need to find what works for you, and use those techniques to your advantage. 

A Well Balanced Diet. 
As cliche as it sounds, you are what you eat. I found this out during this past year.
I always find that when I eat crap – I feel crap. It really is that simple.
Now, I am not saying go out and buy everything local and organic. What I am saying is, take care of your body. Do not fuel it with rubbish.
I love a cream cake, chocolate bar and a good bottle of wine or two. Just learn your limits. Even if it means adding a small portion of extra goodness here and there.
I highly recommend drinking tones of water too! Water flushes all the toxins out of your body. Honestly, it helps so much!

Again, I find this so cliché but it helps me. I can feel an attack coming, I do not get too much of a warning, but I feel my body get tense, I feel my temperature rise and my heart starts beating faster. 
I find myself gasping for air and I have to sit down, wherever I am and just breathe. 
I find that concentrating on something first hand helps, but concentrating on my breathing in turn calms me down. 
I like to take long, deep breaths and close my eyes. Sometimes, when I feel an attack oncoming or I feel a little anxious just doing this prevents the attack even happening.

Sleep is so important, and when I lack sleep I feel awful. Not only being I am tired and ratty but because I cannot function properly, I almost feel like my anxiety has advantages over my body. When I lack sleep and feel as though I am not in control of my body my anxiety tends to heighten and strike at the strangest of times. So I could not recommend sleep enough – although if you are like me … I struggle to fall asleep. 
Once I fall asleep, there are no natural disasters that can shake me, but falling asleep is a mission in itself. 
I find watching/listening to YouTube videos really help me. I love listening to guided meditations on my iPad. They often concentrate on your breathing and tensing your body, then releasing the tenseness and relaxing your mind, body and soul.  

Utilize 'Me' Time.
I work nights and in the care sector, I have a really busy schedule with work and trying to catch up with sleep as well as my blog and business ventures I have taken up this year, so I often found myself a little ‘lost’ I cannot recommend ‘Me’ time enough. Whether it’s as simple as a hour of the evening, to have a hot bubble bath and relax, reading a book or just sitting in my room alone in silence. 
You really need to look after yourself. Why not try it? If you are super busy, set yourself a target. 
Even if you start small. I also love to have time alone to just listen to music. Music helps me and dealing with my anxiety SO much its ridiculous. There is no certain genre or artist. I just love music, music that I can relate too, I love to dance (that does not mean that I can) and I love to sing. Therefore, 
I surround myself by music. I ensure I listen to at least an hour of music a day.

Positive Mindset.
I think I find this the hardest. This is where I struggle the most, but anxiety is and always will be a constant battle. You need to be positive – as hard as it sounds and as hard as it is. 
I am an active thinker. Everything happens for a reason, and I need to know that reason, I need to understand that reason and if I do not, there is a reason, so I am constantly thinking, overthinking and rethinking – it is a killer. 
Sometimes, just sometimes I need to almost slap myself in the face. I need to remind myself that the only way I will beat this, and the moods is to be positive. 
The world is not out to get you. It does not matter if someone doesn’t like you! It does not matter if friends cancel a date, just because someone did not text you first – it does not mean they hate you. I find quotes help loads. I spend hours on Pinterest looking up positive quotes and I love following positive people. Whether that is in life, by surrounding myself with positive people or on my social media – following positive celebrities or people.

Talk, Talk and Talk some more.
Without doubt my biggest and best coping mode. As soon as I feel crap, I talk. Whether it’s to a friend, my mum or even writing a blog post. I started this blog three years ago, and throughout my blogging journey its taken me a while to find where I would fit in. I love makeup, I am a trained beauty therapist,
 I love fashion and I am an advocate for the plus sized woman and proving that just because you are plus size it does not mean you cannot succeed or be happy. I love travelling and food. I realized this year that it does not matter if I do not fit in. this is my blog and what I want to write is up to me, if people read it – great! If not, who actually cares?

I enjoy doing this and it makes me happy. That is why I feel so passionate about writing and expressing my feelings and thoughts when it comes to mental health. Whether someone reads this and finds it helps or not. It helps me. If I feel like I cannot talk to someone, or its too late at night and I need an outlet there my blog is where I turn. It does not mean I have to publish the post, but being about to talk (type technically and to myself) it helps. 
Find your outlet, 
talk, scream if you need too just do not keep it inside because it will kill you.

Accept the Inevitable.
I find it hard to cope sometimes, as mentioned previously I am such a active thinker, and this is such a struggle for me. Accepting the inevitable has helped me though. Sometimes you cannot control what happens around you.
 Sometimes people are nasty and vile. Sometimes people die (morbid I know, but the truth) sometimes people move on and change. It is all part of life and holding on will not help your anxiety. 
Accept the inevitable and move the fuck on. If you cannot change it, do not worry. I love the saying “If it's not going to matter in 5 years, don't spend more than 5 minutes being upset about it”

Walk, Run, Jog. 
Whenever I feel anxious, I find the outside helps. Being cooped up inside your house never helps and never makes you feel better, although it is my ‘safe place’ getting outside and experiencing the nature will help you.
 The fresh air, the freedom. Whether you go for a drive, walk, run, jog, skip or bloody jump! Get outside. 
Even your backyard. Exercise helps loads too, besides the happy endorphin's that it creates; it makes you focus on something other than all the shit anxiety brings.

Face your fears. 
I have many, spiders, snakes, clowns, death, loneliness, heights I could go on …. Now do not panic. I am not about to say that the only way to beat anxiety is to start a battle against the world’s largest snakes, spiders and clowns whilst at 15000ft alone *hahaha* but small steps will help. 
If you wake up one day and you are supposed to be meeting friends, and your anxiety is starting to play havoc then you take control! This is your life, not your anxieties! Find your steps which help you control and keep your anxiety at bay and use these to your advantage.
I promise you, you’ll feel so much better for trying than for giving in. There has been many of occasions that I have not gone to social events and met up with friends because of my anxiety and depression. I can tell you that the alternative of staying in – does not help.

Learn your triggers.
You need to be able to identify your triggers to be able to cope. You also need to be able to identify them to be able to battle them. Believe it or not, 
one of my biggest triggers surrounds people, and crowds. Yes – I avoid them because I know that is the easiest thing to do but it does not stop me from going out.
 I learn where to go, and where not to go, certain times will be busier.
 I also find going out with people who understand my anxiety helps.

I hope that this helps someone. 
If you ever need to talk, then please message me. 
I am always here. 
You are NEVER alone! 

Want to talk? 
Please feel free to email me, or find me on social media (all linked on my blog) and I will be more than happy to speak to you. Use the Hashtag #BISDTT to get the conversation started online!

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